Wonderland!
by AlinaintheSky
Summary: The cast of FY does Wonderland! Yes, aren't you sick of my parodies? (evil grin) This one's gonna be fun.......
1. Program

Disclaimer: I do not own Wonderland or FY.  
  
Liss: Hello and welcome to one of my many FY parodies. Today's parody is Wonderland. Wonderland is a play, based on Alice Through The Looking Glass. Now, this play will be a little different, since we have the cast of FY to do it. Wonderland is the play my theater program is doing, so I was like, "Why not make a parody?"  
  
Skaara: Because it's a stupid idea.  
  
Liss: Oi, why do you have to be such a jerk all the time?  
  
Skaara: Because, if I'm a jerk, then you won't like me anymore and I can leave! *realizes he just gave away his whole plan* Oops...  
  
Liss: Ah, well that explains a lot. But it won't work. I'll just chain you up if you act like that. Then it'll be even worse for you. But besides, when you act like a jerk, it makes you even cuter. *squeeze*  
  
Skaara: *rolls eyes* God I wish she would stop doing that.  
  
Liss: Ok, on with the program!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Le Programme  
  
(some people have been cast more than once)  
  
Alice- Miaka  
  
Red King- Nakago  
  
White King- Hotohori  
  
Red Queen- Yui  
  
White Queen- Nuriko  
  
Red Knight- Tasuki  
  
White Knight- Tamahome  
  
Red Pawn- Miboshi  
  
White Pawn- Chiriko  
  
Red Chess Pieces: Qu-Dong palace guards  
  
White Chess Pieces: Hong-nan palace guards  
  
Hatta- Soi  
  
Humpty Dumpty- Tomo  
  
Tweedle Dee- Amiboshi  
  
Tweedle Dum- Suboshi  
  
Lion- Suboshi  
  
Unicorn- Amiboshi  
  
Train Conductor- Chichiri  
  
Proper Authority #1- Kris  
  
Proper Authority #2- Sarah  
  
Proper Authority #3- Hilary  
  
Hot Dog Vender- Mitzukake  
  
Rose- Lady Naria  
  
Tiger Lily- Angel  
  
Daisy- Jdogg  
  
Roses: hired Lady Naria followers  
  
Tiger-Lilies: hired Angel followers  
  
Daisies: hired Jdogg followers  
  
Red Cheerleaders: Qu-Dong palace Inner Serangulo peoples  
  
White Cheerleaders: Hong-nan palace Inner Serangulo peoples  
  
Red Baseball team/Wallflowers/Tourists: Qu-Dong palace guards  
  
White Baseball team/Wallflowers/Tourists: Hong-nan palace guards  
  
Glass Dancers: Lion, Unicorn, Roper Authorities, Rose, Daisy, Tiger-Lily, Hot Dog Vender, Humpty Dumpty, White Queen and King, Red Queen and King, Red Pawn, and White Pawn  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Note: Kris, Sarah, Hilary, Lady Naira, Angel, and Jdogg are not part of FY. They are completely independent and have cameos in this. They own themselves.  
  
Sorry I can't spell Inner Serangulo or whatever!  
  
Liss: So, what do you think? Sounds good? Sorry, there were so many roles that I had to double-cast everyone. But, if you review over the progress of this story, I could switch it so you get a cameo and play one of the parts...but make sure you review every chapter, or you could miss it! Ok, review!!! 


	2. Jabberwockey!

Disclaimer: I do not own FY or Wonderland so leave me the hell alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (sorry my internet connection is acting up and it's driving me CRAZY!!)  
  
Liss: Hello again! Thanks to those of you who are reading this right now. Congratulations! That means you're brave enough to read yet ANOTHER one of my stupid parodies! Thank you! So, without further ado, here's the show!  
  
Cast: *grumbling*  
  
Liss: Why does every parody I do start with you guys grumbling?  
  
Cast: Because we're SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR STUPID PARODIES!  
  
Liss: *lip trembling* R-Really? I-I'm sorry. I-I didn't think it would o- offend you t-that m-much. *tear*  
  
Cast: O.O!!!!!! Don't cry! We're sorry!!!! Really!  
  
Liss: Y-You mean it?  
  
Cast: Yeah!  
  
Liss: Well, in that case...GET YOUR ASSES BEHIND STAGE BEFORE I THROW THEM THERE! Ha ha ha...gets 'em every time.  
  
Cast: *dark looks*  
  
Liss: Ok, let's start!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Cast: *comes out in costume* *spread out over the stage* *music starts* *cast does that little step-touch step-touch with the toes thingy and claps to it*  
  
Story-time and randomness go hand in hand it seems!  
  
Time for making stupid fics and sharing crazy dreams!  
  
Join us here at ff.net where we can make your spirit soar!  
  
Splash some fiction in your life that wasn't there before!  
  
Come along and have some fun!  
  
There's lots for you to read!  
  
Read about some anime,  
  
And laugh like you're on weed!  
  
You can close your eyes, and make believe,  
  
No matter what your age!  
  
We've got magic up our pens,  
  
Here at ff.net!  
  
HI LISS! *wave to Liss holding a microphone*  
  
Liss: Hello and welcome to FY Wonderland! This song is based on the official theme song for my theater group. So I was thinking, if I'm parodying one of their plays, then why not the song, too?  
  
Cast: Cuz it's stupid!  
  
Liss: Shut up! *smiles to readers* Now, let's just sit back and enjoy the show! But first, remember that there is no eating or drinking inside the theater.  
  
Comic Book Guy (from the Simpsons): *stares at his Doritos, popcorn, and Coke*  
  
Liss: Or gum chewing.  
  
Comic Book Guy: *swallows*  
  
Liss: Alright! Then let's get going!  
  
Cast: *start dancing again* *music is on*  
  
Read a magic story from the daylight to the dark!  
  
Take your laptop out for a picnic in the park!  
  
Let us take you by the ear to a place where chaos ensues!  
  
In a magic wonderland that ff.net created for you!  
  
Come along and have some fun!  
  
There's lots for you to read!  
  
Read about some anime,  
  
And laugh like you're on weed!  
  
You can close your eyes, and make believe,  
  
No matter what your age!  
  
We've got magic up our pens,  
  
HERE AT FF.NET!!!!!!!!!! *harmony* *waves to the audience as they exit*  
  
1, 2, 3, SHUT UP!  
  
-lights dim; they come back on to reveal Miaka sitting on a chair in front of a table chess set; the glass dancers are looking down upon her-  
  
Miaka: Let's see. *picks up a piece and bits into it* What a rip off! It's not even edible! Stupid Parker Bros. ... Ok Kitty, it's your turn.  
  
Miaka's mother: Alice, are you ready yet? We're going to be late.  
  
Miaka: Almost!  
  
Tama-neko: *sitting on a chair next to her* *picks up the queen and moves it correctly, taking out Miaka's queen*  
  
Miaka: Hey! That's not fair!  
  
Tama-neko: *smirks*  
  
Miaka: *check to see that no one is looking* What's that?! TUNA! *points behind Tama-neko*  
  
Tama-neko: *frantically dives to find it*  
  
Miaka: *smirking, moves the pieces around*  
  
Tama-neko: *comes back with a fish in his mouth*  
  
Miaka: WHAT?! THERE WAS REALLY TUNA THERE?! Grr...But look, Tama-neko, your move is wrong! If we were in Konan, I-I mean, Wonderland, heh heh, you would be severely punished for that! I would lock you up! Because everything in Ko- I mean, Wonderland, is backwards. *looks in mirror* *notices she's fat* Hmm. Must be one of those fun house mirrors.  
  
Glass Dancers: *start to come down* *weird music plays* *they dance around her*  
  
Miaka: W-What's happening? Kitty!  
  
One of the glass dancers: *holds out their hand on the opposite side of the mirror*  
  
Miaka: Ooh, is this like Tai Yi-Jun's mirror with the food?!  
  
Glass dancer: No.  
  
Miaka: *disappointed* Oh. *takes hand and steps through the mirror* *mirror shattering noise is heard*  
  
-more dancing and moving-  
  
Miaka: Woo...pretty colors...  
  
-music stops; glass dancers exit; Red and White chess pieces and cheerleaders enter-  
  
Miaka: *looks around* I sure ain't in Japan anymore.  
  
Miboshi: Yoink! *snatches a book from Chiriko*  
  
Chiriko: Hey! Give that back! Waaaaaaaah!  
  
Miboshi: Nah nah nah nah nah!  
  
Chiriko: *chases him around Miaka* *a few red and white chess pieces chase them too*  
  
Nakago: I am the king! Give it here!  
  
Pieces: *keep running*  
  
Hotohori: I'm a king too, you know!  
  
Miaka: Hello?  
  
Nuriko: Children, please.  
  
Pieces: *keep running*  
  
Miaka: Can any one hear me?  
  
Yui: STOP THAT NOW!  
  
Pieces: *stop*  
  
Miboshi: That's mine! Get off of it!  
  
Chiriko: It belongs to everybody!  
  
Hotohori: Children, I think it would be best if we just stop fighting and---  
  
Miboshi: *stomps on his foot*  
  
Miaka: Excuse me!  
  
Hotohori: He stomped on the royal foot! Off with his-  
  
Miaka: I said, EXCUSE ME!!!!!  
  
Everyone: *gasp*  
  
Miaka: Uh...hello! *walks up to Yui* Hey, you look oddly familiar...  
  
Yui: Don't you *hello* me!  
  
Nakago: Who are you?  
  
Nuriko: Yes little girl...I mean big girl...I mean....who are you?  
  
Nakago: And what are you doing here?  
  
Miaka: What?  
  
Yui: What?  
  
Hotohori: What?  
  
All: What are you doing here?!  
  
Some red and white chess pieces: *come out and study her: pick at her hair and clothes*  
  
Miaka: Please stop that!  
  
Nakago: Conclusion?  
  
Pieces: *hold up one finger* Human.  
  
Nakago: Now, I'll ask you again. What are you doing here?  
  
Miaka: Well, to begin with, I'm introducing myself! *chipper*  
  
Hotohori: Splendid! Allow me to introduce *my*self!  
  
Yui: Oh hush! That's not what we meant at all!  
  
Miaka: Well, can you help me? I seemed to have lost my way.  
  
Yui: I don't know anything about YOUR way. All the ways around here belong to me!  
  
Nuriko: And me!  
  
Soi: *yawn* I want lines.  
  
Nuriko: Where did you come from, child?  
  
Miaka: I came through the looking glass.  
  
Hotohori: Through the what?  
  
Yui: I don't see any looking glass!  
  
Nuriko: Poor dear, she must be delirious. Let me talk to her. Hello dear, have you hit your head?  
  
Hotohori: Knocked your noggin?  
  
Yui: Cracked your crown?  
  
Miaka: No!  
  
Nuriko: Alright, alright, now, you say you came through a looking glass? To what exactly? Why would you do a thing like that?  
  
Miaka: No reason. Just stupid.  
  
Hotohori: Stupider and stupider.  
  
Yui: CHILDREN! Stop that this instant! Do you want to be sent to your rooms with ICE CREAM and PUDDING?? Well do you??  
  
Pieces: *shake their heads* Yes.  
  
Yui: Well than stop being so...good!  
  
Pieces: *fight*  
  
Miaka: Wow, K-I mean, Wonderland! It really does exist!  
  
Nakago: Well of course it does. The question is, do you?  
  
Miaka: Do I what?  
  
Nakago: Do you exist?  
  
Miaka: Well of course I do!  
  
All: Prove it.  
  
Miaka: Well I...I...uh...  
  
All: Hmmmmm?  
  
Miaka: I...  
  
Yui: Just as I thought! She isn't here! Goodbye! *shoves her*  
  
Miaka: Wait! *sits on a chess piece, squashing it to the ground* If I don't exist then who's squashing this piece?  
  
Red pieces: Hmmm...  
  
Red Cheerleaders: *fixing their hair*  
  
Liss: AHEM!  
  
Red Cheerleaders: Oh what? Oh sorry. Good point!  
  
White Cheerleaders: I can see her side of it!  
  
White Pieces: Could be!  
  
Piece: Help...  
  
Yui: Fine, you can exist.  
  
Miaka: Thank you. Now, what's all this fuss about?  
  
Nakago: It's a book. You do have books where you come from, right?  
  
Miaka: Of course!  
  
Nuriko: Can you read, child?  
  
Miaka: Yes!  
  
All: OMG!!! SHE CAN READ!!! IT'S A MIRACLE!!! I THOUGHT SHE'D NEVER GET PAST THE LETTER 'A'! IT'S AMAZING!!!!!  
  
Liss: *snicker*  
  
Miaka: *death look*  
  
Nakago: Is this the language you read? *shoves the book in her face*  
  
Miaka: Well I can't read anything if it's that close to my nose!  
  
Nakago: *rolls his eyes and moves it down* Is this better?  
  
Miaka: Thank you. *takes book* Yes, I can read this!  
  
All: Oh yay. I'm so happy. Someone pinch me, I'm dreaming. (can you tell its sarcastic?)  
  
Miaka: Would you like me to read it to you?  
  
All: Yes please. *gather around her*  
  
Miaka: It says, "Ykcowrebbaj sevot yhtils eht dna ,gillirb sawT` ebaw eht ni elbmig dna eryg diD ,sevogorob eht erew ysmim llA .ebargtuo shtar emom eht dnA ..."  
  
Yui: Told you she couldn't read!  
  
Nakago: No you didn't...  
  
Yui: *elbows him*  
  
Nakago: Ow! *rubs elbow while glaring at Yui*  
  
Nuriko: We all can do that, child.  
  
Hotohori: But do you know what it means?  
  
Miaka: I'm afraid not.  
  
Nakago: Then why did you say you could?  
  
Miaka: You didn't ask me that! You only asked me if I could read it! Big difference, Mullet-Man.  
  
Liss: *snicker*  
  
Nakago: Hey! I do now have a mullet! *pets hair*  
  
Miaka: Riiiight...  
  
Yui: Come along, children. *to Miaka* You've been a great help. *sneers*  
  
Miaka: Wait! I know what it says!  
  
All: Yeah yeah, whatever.  
  
Miaka: No really! It's a Looking Glass Book!  
  
All: *stop* A what?  
  
Miaka: A Looking Glass Book! See all the words are backwards! If I only had a mirror!  
  
Soi and Hotohori: *admiring their reflections in a mirror* What? Noooooo! Not the sacred mirror! Noooo! *cry*  
  
Nakago: Stop being such a baby. *plucks the mirror from them and hands it to Miaka*  
  
Miaka: Oh how fortunate! See, in a mirror, all the words go the right way!  
  
Nuriko: Suzaku, she's right!  
  
Yui: Let me see! *tries to bump Nakago out of the way with her butt* *fails because her butt is really small* *mutters to herself* If only I had Miaka's behind, then I could bump even Tai Yi-Jun!  
  
Nakago: Well somebody read it!  
  
-funky music starts and people start dancing-  
  
Miaka, Yui, Nakago, Hotohori, Nuriko, and Soi: *singing* Jabberwocky, talky talky, can you comprehend every word I'm saying?  
  
All from before, add the chess pieces: Jabberwocky, talky talky, rappin' every syllable, swinging and swayin'!  
  
All: Jabberwocky, talky talky, the rhythm of the syntax is quite appealin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, a purely non-sensible, illogical, funky feelin'!  
  
Hotohori: *rapping* Twas brillig, and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe!  
  
All: In the wabe!  
  
Nuriko: All mimsy were the borogoves, and the mome raths outgrabe!  
  
All: Outgrabe!  
  
Nakago: You'd best beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, and the claws that catch!  
  
Yui: You'd best beware the Jujub bird, and shun-  
  
All: And shun!  
  
Yui: The frumious-  
  
All: Frumious!  
  
Yui: Bandersnatch!  
  
All: Oh my! *singing* Jabberwocky talky talky, can you comprehend every word I'm saying? Jabberwocky, talky talky, rappin' every syllable, swinging and swayin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, the rhythm of the syntax is quite appealin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, a purely non-sensible, illogical, funky feelin'!  
  
Hotohori: *rapping* He took his vorpal sword in hand: long time the manxome foe he sought!  
  
Nuriko: So rested he by the Tumtum tree, and stood awhile in thought.  
  
All: In thought!  
  
Yui: And as in uffish thought he stood, the Jabberwock!, with eyes of flame, came whiffling through the tulgey wook, and burbled-  
  
Hotohori, Nuriko, Soi, and Nakago: Burbled?  
  
Chess Pieces: Burbled?  
  
Cheerleaders: Burbled?  
  
Yui: Burbled, as it came.  
  
All: *singing* Jabberwocky talky talky, can you comprehend every word I'm saying? Jabberwocky, talky talky, rappin' every syllable, swinging and swayin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, the rhythm of the syntax is quite appealin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, a purely non-sensible, illogical, funky feelin'!  
  
Nuriko: *rapping* One, two!  
  
All: One, two!  
  
Nuriko: And through and through, the vorpal blade went snicker-snack!  
  
Hotohori: He left it dead, and with its head, he went galumphing back.  
  
All: Oh yeah!  
  
Yui: And has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day!  
  
All: Calloh! Callay!  
  
Yui: He chortled in his joy.  
  
All: Right on, right on!  
  
Miaka: `Twas brillig, and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe!  
  
All: *freaked out that the whitest girl they have ever seen is rapping* Uh...in the wabe...*back away slowly*  
  
Miaka: *totally oblivious* *jumping up and down, dancing like it's the 80s* All mimsy were the borogoves, and the mome raths outgrabe!  
  
All: Outgrabe...*start to get into it*  
  
Miaka: You'd best beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, and the claws that catch! You'd best beware the Jujub bird, and shun-  
  
All: And shun!  
  
Miaka: The frumious-  
  
Hotohori: Frumious?  
  
Nuriko: Frumious?  
  
Nakago: Frumious?  
  
Yui: Frumious?  
  
Miaka: Bandersnatch!  
  
All: Bandersnatch?  
  
Miaka: Bandersnatch!  
  
All: Oh my! *singing* Jabberwocky talky talky, can you comprehend every word I'm saying? Jabberwocky, talky talky, rappin' every syllable, swinging and swayin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, the rhythm of the syntax is quite appealin'! Jabberwocky, talky talky, a purely non-sensible, illogical, funky feelin'! *fall to the floor for the end of the song*  
  
-music stops-  
  
Nuriko: *claps hands* *white pieces rise*  
  
Yui: *snaps like a soul sista* *red pieces rise*  
  
-all leave-  
  
Miaka: Wait! Oh, goodbye! It was a great song! Oh, I do wish I could play!  
  
Liss: Yeah, well, go play with your little seishi or something while I try to remember the rest of this play. *thinks*  
  
Cast: You don't remember it?  
  
Liss: *sadly shakes head*  
  
Cast: WAHOO!  
  
Liss: *death glare*  
  
Cast: I mean, uh-no, how sad. *tear* I don't think I can handle it.  
  
Liss: *glares*  
  
Cast: No! Help us! Please! I can't go on! *crawl to Liss's feet*  
  
Liss: *stares*  
  
Cast: Can't...survive...must...have more...play...  
  
Liss: Grr...  
  
Cast: Too much?  
  
Liss: Yeah.  
  
Cast: *gets up, embarrassed*  
  
Liss: So, stick around for more, coming as soon as I remember it! *wink* Hmm...*thinks hard* This doesn't seem to be working for me. AAAAAAANNNNNNEEEEE!!!!!!  
  
PS. Press it! *funky music* Press it good, now!  
  
I  
  
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V 


End file.
